Just a few weeks ago, I had a handful of moments where I was beyond overwhelmed. While it may be part postpartum, I knew it has got to be something else. I know because I have been in this space before far too many times. You know, the one where we try to do it all.This time around, I know there is no such thing. If such is the case, how do we then get some things done?
I stumbled upon Jessica Turner’s The Fringe Hours last month and what a timely blessing it was. I was reminded of what I can do to take care of me when I find myself in this old familiar space of wrestling with balance.Here are ways I am able to restore balance in my days:
1. I rally my village for support.
It is a gift to learn how to ask and receive help. As I self-professed DIY-er, this is something that is still taking me time to learn. I am fortunate to have a husband that helps out equally with both household and child-rearing duties. I am also blessed to have extended family and friends who I know I can count on when a breather is in order. When a neighbor offers to drop off a meal when I am sleep deprived to make one, I gladly accept. If your village includes house help or nanny, by all means, delegate some of the work without the guilt. We can all recognize that on some days that we do not accomplish not very much, it is okay to ask and accept help.
2. Complete tasks according to priority
My family is the priority in this season of my life. For you it may be work, or school or combination of sorts. The bulk of my time is spent caring for my husband, two preschoolers and a newborn. When confronted with the daily decision of what needs to be done today, I go back to where my priorities lie. Everything that I complete first relates to my family, all else come second. When I keep this in check, I avoid spreading myself too thin with other things that come my way.
3. Say yes and also say no.
While it is quite tempting to say yes to everything that comes across my plate, recognizing my priorities (see above) makes it easier for me to know when to say yes and when to say no. Given such, I say no to duties in mommy clubs but yes to playdates with friends. I say yes to nature walks with my little ones. I say yes to book reads during nap times. I say no to excessive time online. I say no to things that take me away for what truly matters to my heart and I say yes to things that re-energizes me so I can fulfill what God has tasked me to do.
4. Find “me time” and make it blissful.
Everyone is given the same 24 hours in a day. It is all upto us how we are going to spend it. After spending some time reflecting on how much time I unknowingly waste, I become more intentional with how I spend my days. I search for pockets of time in the day and spend it on me.I prepare what I will need to make for the family breakfast early so I have extra time for a warm, luxurious, quiet bath. I lessen my time scrolling endlessly on social media and spend more time reading and going outside for walks. Identify your time wasters and turn those pockets of time into your joy givers.So, take some time for yourself, get the massage you told yourself you will get (regardless of whatever season you are in your life). Give yourself permission to rest, renew, and to really slow down.
“You can’t do everything, so don’t fall into the trap of trying. Instead, find the moments in each aspect of your life that invigorate you, and imbalance your life towards those.” Marcus Buckingham
Let’s encourage each other! I would love to hear how are you planning to use your fringe hours?Share this: